late night poetry session

I*m a melancholic  alcoholic

Drunk on the memories

Turning sober from reality, that I’m escaping from- eternally

A vicious circle, I cannot find the key

from breaking.. It’s always just me who is breaking, aching..

No I’ll never break free

 

Don’t pity me, it is I who pull the rope

that turns me blue

Do not attempt to save me

You will never manage to break through

There is a wall of guilt and shame, separating this living corpse from you

 

I am a hopeless junkie; addicted to all things that chain me down

A loveless prostitute with the need for a constant substitute

A loser to boot, on a selfdestructive pursuit

I’m sinking further, deeper; dear gods just let me drown

 

But I don’t want your pity, no

I’m just paying down my loans,

repenting my sins

By crushing my own bones

and whipping my skin