I’ve met my share of bad guys
I’ve seen enough of the monsters among us
I knew so damn well how I didn’t want to be
But now I have witnessed another side to me
and this has me questioning my character
One thing is for sure: I’m no angel
I’m a lot more like Lucifer
I don’t want to be like this, I don’t want to be like this!
I don’t want this to be who I am!
I don’t want to be a raging beast, I want to be the lamb!
How do I look myself in the mirror
without that dreaded sense of terror
I want to be a decent human being
But there seems to be an error
The evil that humans do..
Now I am a monster among us too
I always knew my core values and my beliefs and attitudes
But that was before I was faced with twisted thoughts and darker moods
Feels like I don’t know who I am anymore
Seems I have forgotten about who and what I was before
There’s a sense of innocence I have lost forever
I can no longer say the simple phrase “I would never”
I’ve done things that can’t be forgiven
How do I explain this to myself
I don’t believe in a devil, still I seem to be..
fucking devil-driven
And now when I face myself in the mirror
it’s always with that dreaded sense of terror
All I want is to be a decent human
But in my mind there is an error
The evil that humans do..
Now I am a monster among us too
Does it help you that I hate myself?
That I place myself at the bottom shelf?
Does it bring you any comfort that all of this makes me feel like I’m living in hell?
That my mind has been reduced to a tiny prison cell?
Does it help that there’s times where I wanna kill myself?
Every day I have to live with my mistakes
And the fear that I might once again lose my brakes
and slam head first into madness again
Living with that fear, it’s a constant strain
The more it happens, the less there is of me
that seems to remain
And now I want to smash the mirror
I want to smash my brain to pieces too
I’ve met my share of monsters
I know the evil humans do
I swore I’d never be like one of them
But what do you know
Now I am a monster among us too
Now I am a monster among us too!
All my core-beliefs and attitudes
I used to follow both the spoken and unspoken rules
It really is the worst thing, to lose yourself completely
Mad thoughts, they come at me so intense and fleetly
Does it help you at all to know that
living life with this disorder is anything but easy?
Does it help you at all that there are times where suicide seems the only way?
Does it help you knowing that if I could, I would never have been born this way?
It doesn’t help at all does it..
All these petty words I say
The only thing that really helps is
if I just go away
Ok so let me just go away..
I don’t expect to be forgiven
I don’t even believe in a devil, yet I seem to be..
Fucking devil-driven
‘Cuz I know so damn well the evil that humans do
Yeah, I know so damn well about the evil that we do
I swore on my father’s grave I’d never be like that
Now I am a monster among us too
I am a monster among us too..
I don’t want to be like this, I don’t want to be like this!
I don’t want this to be who I am!
I don’t want to be the raging beast, I want to be the lamb!
