Why does it feel like it’s never ending

The pain is still throbbing somewhere under my skin

I wish I could go numb and cold

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I wish I could go back in time

Erase the day I met you

Maybe you don’t understand, but you raped my fucking mind

My brain no longer feels like it’s mine

I’d tell you whatever it is you want to hear

I just don’t understand what you want

I’ve given up everything

And still you don’t care

All these years I spent in vain,spinning a fairytale of lies

When it comes down to it, I still can’t tell what is hiding behind your eyes

And my own brain seems to go insane

Each time I get too close to the truth

It really hurts, how these violent turns

Stole so many years of my youth

I don’t like myself anymore

But the sad truth is

I wasn’t that much better before

Just better at lying I guess

Well I can’t lie no more

I’ve never felt more sure

I see myself for exactly what I am

I can’t lie no more

Problem is, you can

Shit, you’re still so pretty

That just ain’t me

And that will never be me

You’ve seen me at my worst, you know just how ugly I can get

And I’ve seen it too, so there goes my self respect

I tried so hard to change, but it lead me nowhere

All the demons in my head, they’re still there

I’ll never know what’s hiding behind your eyes

All I know, is I have to end this fairytale of lies