You have the drugs, I have the memories and the shame

I don’t know why I’m standing my ground, why I don’t join in on the game

I guess I prefer the gun before I resort to your solutions

I go insane, but at least I can say I don’t provoke it

So take your stash and choke on it

 

I see the future unfold from time to time, but I never ask to see

It’s always multiple scenarios, and I can’t tell which it’s going to be

But I guess I can say it’s in both of our cards

That we will never get that far

And I see early graves waiting for us both

I’m sorry, baby- I can’t lie under oath

 

You have the knife, I have the scars

Who knows, when you’ll pick me as an enemy

I saw the red flags, I heard the alarms, but I’m so used to them

When did any of us have any relationship that was some kind of healthy

I think the sad truth is

I prefer a stone cold murderer over someone pretending to save me

And I learned it the hard way:

Trusting anyone can be deadly

 

I see the past that I buried from time to time, and it brings me to my knees

I guess that is what fuelled this fucking disease

So it was always in my cards

That I will never get far

Trauma stunts your growth

And if I ever tried to take this shit to court

I  know I would be forced to lie under oath

 

Damaged children, trying to live like adults

You just gotta be grateful that you still have a pulse

That you survived all the suicidal impulses

You just gotta live with it

That you are someone the normal ones repulses

Like they can smell the rotten flesh from all the bullet holes

It’s like they can see the stains on our souls

 

Now I want to get back to my solitude

You are breaking all the rules

I don’t know why I stand my ground

All I know is it’s harder when you are around

We are two lost souls, sinking deep at sea

Maybe you feel like you’ll drown faster if you hang on to me

But I want to drown alone now

I feel lonelier somehow with your arms around my neck

I need to drown alone now

There’s only room for one inside this ship wreck

 

Let me drown alone, I’m not afraid

There was a time we felt like we were made

But we are just two lost souls that can’t be saved

Two lost souls that can’t be saved

So let go of my hand now

And drown alone

Because even with you

I feel lonely to the bone

I feel lonely to the bone