Song for the sleepless

I’m sorry mami, for letting you down

You taught me how to swim

and still I drown

🌑

I’m sorry brother, for being such a misfit

You taught me how to fight

Yet all I do is quit

🌑

I’m sorry!

So sorry..

I know you worry

I tell you I’m doing fine

But you know I crossed the line

Ain’t no coming back from this

🌑

I’m sorry sister

For being so damn fragile

Each time you do something right

I do something wrong

And all I can do is tell you in a song..

🌑

I’m sorry!

So sorry..

I know you worry

I tell you I’m doing fine

But you know I crossed the line

Ain’t no coming back from this

Some women

Some women are like roses, some women are like thorns..

Some women have halos, and some of us have horns..

I’m not your angel

I am the witch that broke your spell

I’m not the redeemer, I am the dragon raising hell

Did I say you could stare at me like that?

Are you admiring my tail..?

Don’t look too long into my eyes

You won’t like what they unveil

Are you feeling nervous..?

Do I make you feel unwell?

I know you think I taste like paradise

But baby, I was born and raised in hell

Empty words

I feel scared

It’s either really dark in here

or I have gone blind

I was searching for answers

I can’t seem to find

I was looking for the truth

Instead I lost my mind

🎶

I’m a hopeless case

Someone should replace

my useless self

I’m bottom shelf

..material

I had hope once, but I was living in denile

Someone should put my ass on trial

I’m not handling life very well

Find a judge and send me to hell

🎵

It hurts to think

My brain appears to be dysfuntional

Think I’m on the brink

I’m too damn emotional

I can not trust myself

My nerves are snapping

What the fuck is happening

🎶

I’m a hopeless case

Someone should erase

Can’t make amends

Can’t summon a defence

I can’t rewrite my past

How long will this life last?

🎵

I’m spinning out of control

For every moment passed

I sink further down the hole

It’s time to pull the plug

Swipe my life under the rug

I’m frozen in time

🎶

I’m a basket case

Fell so far from grace

Just put me out of my misery

Gambling with my sanity

No chance to find serenity

🎵

It’s time to jump the ship

I can no longer tolerate the whip

My words mean jack shit

This time the bullet really hit

I’m an astronaut lost in outer space

and man, do I hate my face

It’s time to say the final words

And for the executioners to raise their swords

But all I got

All I got are these empty words

Daytime dreamer

I wrote another song for you. It’s all I can do.

🎵

Take my hand

I’ll take us somewhere better

We’ve both been scarred

By the life we lived before

Trust me

Follow me out that door

🎵

You’re such a handsome man

Ain’t nobody loving you

Like only I can

🎵

You touched my soul

Just when I thought it had turned cold

We’re both wounded

Not beyond repair

If only you’d let me heal you

I’ll make your pain disappear

🎵

You have such gentle hands

Such a mysterious smile

I beg you to come over

I’ll make it worth your while..

🎵

It’s your turn to trust me now

I said I’d wait and I do

Find faith in me somehow

Believe in me and you

Do you still have dreams about me?

I’ll make each one of them come true

🎵

I’d do anything

To make you mine

Oh, you’re such a handsome man

Ain’t nobody loving you

Like only I can

Sweet surrender

I keep pretending

That my broken heart is mending

There is a voice in my ear

Whispering it won’t get better from here

🎵

Tell me all the facts

So I can get my head sorted out

You know so much more than me

I’m chained to the ground

Only the truth can set me free

🎵

I was hoping

That if you saw me coping

Dealing with my demons

You’d save a place for me

🎵

There’s a voice in my ear

Telling me it’s now or never

Can you wait forever?

‘Cuz I’m running out of time

And ever since I met you

I can’t keep track on my mind

🎵

Get out of my head

Guess I’ll go crazy instead

Get out of my head

And back to my bed

🎵

You have the answers I seek

And the lies pour out of you each time you speak

And still I crawl back hoping you’ll crack

I lost my mind, I can’t seem to get it back

🎵

Get out, get out from my head

Tenk over det

Ikke spring så fort fra livet

Kanskje er det på tide å la det ta deg igjen

Ikke hopp fra stupet enda

Slutt å se på døden som en venn

🦋

Pust.

Bare stopp opp 5 minutter og pust-

Ting kan bli bedre

selv om du ikke ser det

🦋

Tenk over det

Du har kravlet rundt på bunnen før

Klatret opp igjen centimeter for centimeter

Til armene verker og fingrene blør

Men du har klart det før

🦋

Hold ut

Selv om smertene nesten gjør deg gal

Og du føler at du står stille

For det finnes ingen mal

🦋

Du kan klare det

Du vil klare det

Det tar bare litt tid

Gi deg selv den tiden

Friheten venter der fremme

Det er den ene tingen du ikke får glemme

Out of fuel

Take me back

to when I was a child

Before all the madness and sadness

Before my thoughts were running wild

🎵

I feel so empty

I feel so hollow!

My thoughts lead me astray

All I can do is follow

🎵

Take me home

Take me anywhere

I think I’ve gone numb and blind

It’s so cold and dark in here

Inside of my own mind

🎵

Pray for me

I don’t believe in a god but still

I’m no longer afraid to die

And I know that I will

🎵

Hold me

Hold me..

The night is so long and cruel

I know I’m supposed to go on with my life

But I ran out of fuel

Red dead redemption

Pour me another drink

So I can drown out what I think

Don’t ask me how I feel

I’m scared my words will make it real

🎵

I’m terrified

For this life

Can’t decide

Suicide doesn’t seem so bad right now

I’m living on death row

I can barely remember my own name

I’m not cut out for this game

🎵

Darkness reigns

I can’t restrain

My mind is always going backwards

Please pause my brain

🎵

But there’s a voice whispering

at the back of my head

And I’m still not dead

I still have time

And I know I can make my life.. mine

🎵

It’s gonna get better

I’m determined to turn the table

Back to the drawing board

I’m not using the last resort

I’ll reinvent myself

Move up from the bottom shelf

Time to wipe the slate

I am the master of my own fate

and it’s not too late

🎵

I’ll break free from my chains

Bury my burden

So my mama won’t have to bury me

I’ll set myself free

I’ll find the key

I’ll be whoever I want to be

No, life ain’t done with me

Under the stars

Hold me tight

Rock me goodnight

Reach for me from the other side

🌑

It’s not that I need you

It doesn’t mean that I miss you

It just gets so lonely here

under the stars

Sometimes when I’m not watching my mind

I wonder where you are

And when I’m not watching my heart

I dream of being there with you

🌑

It’s a lonely thing

To be alive

We’re born alone, we die alone

Sometimes I feel so far from home

So I buried my heart under 6

feet of snow

At a place that only I know

🌑

It’s not that I had to

It doesn’t mean that I’m broken

It’s just that I have no use for it

since you left my side

I’m not angry

It just gets so lonely

here under the stars

🌑

Stjerneklart ute. Kald høstluft som prikker i huden. Det er så mye jeg ikke vet, så mye mellom himmel og jord jeg ikke forstår. Jeg liker at det er sånn. At livet til syvende og sist er et mysterium. At uansett hvor mye kunnskap menneskeheten tilegner seg vil det store bildet forbli skjult. Vi skal ikke vite alt. Det er ikke ment for oss. Jeg synes det er vakkert. Vi er bare mennesker. Jorda var her før oss. Jeg håper hun overlever oss. At hun leges fra sårene vi har påført henne. At hun består etter at vi er borte. For vi vil en gang dø ut. Det er det eneste jeg er sikker på.

Code red

Hold meg i hånda

Før meg gjennom dødens dal

Jeg er ikke religiøs

Jeg trenger bare en hjelpende hånd

akkurat nå

Mens stormen raser mellom ørene mine

Og det fryser til is mellom ribbeina mine

🌑

Ikke se ned på meg

Møt blikket mitt heller

Jeg tåler å lese skuffelsen i øynene dine

Jeg tåler alt, bare jeg blir konfrontert med det

Ikke synes synd på meg bak ryggen min

🌑

Ikke gå fra meg

Her på bunnen av ingenting

Jeg er ikke redd

Jeg føler ikke så mye lenger, for å være ærlig

Akkurat dét burde kanskje skremme meg

Men man blir vandt til det meste

Eller kanskje bare nummen

🌑

Ikke bli av sympati

Må du gå, så må du gå

Jeg tåler å høre skrittene dine bort fra meg

Jeg tåler alt, bare jeg blir konfrontert med det

Og for å være ærlig

Burde noen andre leve i mitt sted

For jeg har gitt opp håpet

Kanskje da vil jeg få fred

🌑